Dictionary.com
revitalize [ree-vahyt-l-ahyz]
verb - to give new vitality or vigor to

190 journals. I don't know about you guys, but that many is pretty daunting to me. After shifting through a buttload of uninteresting journals, and a few that caught my interest, I now only have 376 deviations to go through, which I doubt I'll finish tonight.

Why did I even return to DA? I'm not sure. For the last few months, (and, it's been quite a few months since I last, not only updated, but even logged on to DA), I've seriously thought about closing my account forever. But I honestly believe in my heart that this connection holds a deeper meaning to me, obviously because of the friends I've met and stay in touch with through this, especially those I didn't know before DA. Thus, this account will remain open, at least for now.

Life has taken an interesting turn. My circle of friends has expanded, but my close circle has drastically decreased. My goody-goody personality has shifted to one much more liberal and "cool," if you will. My passion for fashion has greatly increased. My religious zeal has flickered and is even now fighting to survive. And I have befriended people I thought I would never befriend before.

I'm busy these days with a competition-civics type class, and college applications. As the days of judgment near, I'm constantly in turmoil: do I want to stray from my connections and my people and go on an adventure? Or should I stay and keep those connections strong? I think I'm beginning to find the idea of adventure more and more appealing. I want to go out and explore, and meet new people, and see new places, and come to face-to-face with people I now, even thinking about them, makes me pine for the day when one day we will meet for real, though far distances keep us apart.

One final thing I want to mention is my art (yeah, that thingy that hardly exists). My art has taken a drastically different direction (not that any of you would know. I never post anything. I STILL don't have a scanner, btw). From drawing anthros and animals, my focus has narrowed to drawing more abstract things, and people, faces, and realism, as did my parents and their parents before them. I shift so far from my previous ambitions, I even now struggle to redraw my own characters from memory and I can no longer draw anthros as skillfully as I could (partially because I am so meticulously concerned with anatomy now). To counter that note, however, on a stroke of random brilliance, I've decided to do a collab comic with one of my school friends, of which, if I plan to actually pursue, I will indubitably post on DA once completed.

In actuality, coming on DA, as I had been avoiding it for so many months, was mostly fueled because I started catching up on some fantasy fiction series lately, a pastime I had nearly forgotten. I'm so used to talking to school friends about this and that, and worrying about future and finance, and reading textbooks and equations and references and educational books. But returning to the worlds of dragons and swords and elves ~ It really took me back, just like how RelientK and Switchfoot always remind me of the good old days (.... 7th grade)(in case you're wondering why, those were the two artists I first downloaded music from, and were the first time I actually started listening to music as a hobby).

To return to a previous note, I want to end with one last rant about my future. My goals remain the same: I will become a veterinarian one day. I will meet my Georgian friends in the near future. But some have added to meet the passions I realize I can never contain: I will conduct an orchestra and/or choir one day. I will play in an orchestra or sing in a choir of at least national renown one day. I will do a stage performance of some disney theatric. And I will draw a picture or sculpt something that will carry my last name's legacy as it did before.

- DNK


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R/L friends:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
gratitude [grat-i-tood, -tyood]
noun - the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful

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I don't usually like making short, personal journals, but I just wanted to say, I had less than 10 people tell me happy birthday in person, about 50 people tell me happy birthday online, and 4 people wish me happy birthday on the phone. Of all those, ~Whiis and =IcyCocoLab's singing the birthday song in a message was without a doubt one of the sweetest birthday wishes I got that day. This goes out to you chicks ~ THANK YOU SOOO MUCH!!!

- DNK

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R/L friends:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
tag [tag]
noun - a trite phrase or saying; cliché

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1. Post these rules.
2. Each tagged person must post 8 things about themselves on their journal.
3. At the end, you have to choose and tag 8 people and post their icons on the same journal.
4. Go to their pages and send a message saying you tagged them.
5. No tag-backs!

1. With no disrespect meant to my friends on DA and all the awesome artists here, I'm bored with DA. The mother of all artblocks has consumed my soul so much so I can't even draw my own characters correctly anymore. I'm very much in consideration of quitting DA.
To be honest, very few things interest me here anymore. I used to check DA 2-5 times daily. Now, I'll forget to check for 2-4 days, and come back to 60 pics and 40 messages, most which I delete as spam. All the artwork of some people I watch divert from the stuff they usually draw, or they only post pictures and vent-art or life-problems' journals. If not, they're calenders, sketches, or badges: generally, stuff that, again, I'm not interested. To those that are gonna flame me for that, don't get me wrong: I'm not belittling your problems, your art, and your photos. I. Just. Don't. Care.
2. Although I hate being busy, I hate being lazy more. As a result, I'm often lazy when I should be doing busy work. Like now, for instance, when I should be trying to START WTP hw...
3. My spiritual faith has gone down the drain. I hate that fact, but I'm not putting much effort into finding it: no one else around me seems to, nor does anyone seem to care much. It's surprisingly easy to pretend to be a Christian.
4. In retrospect, I'm becoming a little bit more depressing when I'm alone or with family. That fact saddens me more (indubitably, linked to my decrease in spirituality).
5. Although I'm not easy to anger, I'm extremely easy to annoy. Pet-peeves include: unfairness/injustice, disobedience, dogs barking constantly, people calling me over and over again, useless messages (in text, voicemail, AIM, Facebook)(ex. I have the one chick who texts me at random days saying something along the lines of "OMG HI!!! I'm so bored ~ Watcha doing?" Honestly. I couldn't give a rat's ass if she was bored or not.) - particularly when I'm genuinely busy -, being woken up rudely, bad/slow drivers, and the list goes on and on and on (congrats if you actually read up to here).
6. For being the fairly optimistic and positive person I am, I know for certain that I have esteem issues given the opportunity.
7. Sometimes, I feel sorry for my parents that they have a son like me in terms of intellect. Sometimes, I wish I was more motivated to please them like any other FOB asain, instead of living in a more Americanized asain lifestyle.
8. In general, I hate tags. Surprisingly, I was happy to get tagged for this (not for the subject matter, but more for the fact that someone actually remembered I existed on DA).

I tag:
Nobody, 'cus I'm lazy and, again, I don't actually care about their responses that much.

eeyup

- DNK

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R/L friends:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
anticipation [an-tis-uh-pey-shuhn]
noun - expectation or hope.

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My last update was... 4 months ago? Hah ~ Not that anyone cares

Anyways, schools almost out. I took all my AP finals in April and May in the midst of AP Testing. Throughout my rough junior year, I learned a lot about myself, many which were disappointingly bad. Furthermore, my grades really went down the drain, and I'm always on the verge of going in the "I'm-so-stupid-I'll-never-get-into-a-good-college" mood. On the positive side, life is fairly well-off, I'm having fun, and I've become more independent and closer to my friends than ever.

Summer looks great. I've already secured my job, my study plans, and left plenty of time to goof off. In terms of art.. well, I'm considering leaving DA over summer. I'm always drawing, but I never post here, and I've noticed my overall interest in DA lately has been rapidly dwindling. *sigh* *shrugs*

- DNK

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R/L friends:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
solace [sol-is]
noun - Rest; relaxation; ease.

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May I start by saying, the chocolate I just ate is 220 Calories per serving (150 of which are contributed by fat). There are 2.5 Servings per bar. In other words, if I had eaten the entire bar (which I didn't, mind you), that woulda been .183 of the daily recommended Servings (on a daily Serving of 3000 Calorie basis (don't say 2000. It's 3000, and some say even 4000, for those under 25). Moral of story: don't eat chocolate alone.

Oof, my last update was in January. I've been checking my DA, but I haven't really been doing anything. Not important... Anyways!

School musical is over! It's interesting that you start appreciating what you have when it's taken away from you, right? I'm shocked at how productive I really am under pressure. Starting 4 AP classes' and 1 pseudo-AP class' homework at midnight will put adequate pressure on anyone, I think. But now that it's over, I feel awesome, and free.

This month is gonna be great. It's Disneyland this coming weekend, then New York the week after, followed by Paramount's Great America, and topped off with Junior Prom to kick off week one of April... followed shortly after by AP Exams (yay.).

Regardless, being able to come home after school is gonna be a good feeling again, and hopefully, with the extra time, I can amp by grades up a bit. Not to mention, a little more exercise, chores, hobbies, and playing with the doggies in the midst of that.

For the few interested, I AM drawing. Yes, shock. They are all in my cute little sketchbook in my backpack, where no one but those that see my IRL can see it. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA (still no scanner)!!! And I have touched my tablet in forever. I still suck at digital art. BUT I am actually proud of some of sketchbook stuff. Shockingly, I move farther and farther away from drawing anthros and animals and more often find myself drawing people. I've found that the unifying feature in most of my drawings is the constant eye-structure and style, of which I have been often criticized.

Sorry if nothing in this journal made sense. Happens when I listen to music while typing. And I wonder why I keep failing those AP essays...

- DNK

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R/L friends: